Anyone heard of dirty windows?

September 11, 2026··

I’ve been experiencing less heavy waves but the windows are less calm. It’s almost like it’s annoying or frustrating to not be further along but I know I still have a ways to go. My physical symptoms have stabilized from reinstatement so I’m holding here. But I don’t think I’ve emotionally recovered yet from the severe rapid taper I was put on that caused severe withdrawal and a 2 week outpatient program.

Paxil — 20 mg — 20 years. Went off now back on — holding
Trazadone 37.5 mg
Buspar 5 mg two times a day

30 Replies

Stuart4d ago

WelcomerEffexor · supporting

@Masha Your comment made me realize this is likely going to be a growing problem with NPs. I'm in Canada and healthcare loves having NPs because they can pay them less but expect the same as an MD. I've found that a lot of MDs aren't well versed in tapering, so I can only imagine it's pretty foreign to NPs as well...

Historic experience tapering off: Citalopram 20mg | Effexor 75mg | Valium 20mg || "Insanity is the only sane reaction to an insane society" Thomas Szasz

Masha4d ago

LighthousePaxil · holding

Don’t do anything without an educated psychiatrist. Our waitlist for a psych was OVER A YEAR. so you use the provider that’s available. Something is terribly wrong. You only get good care once you’re in crisis.

Paxil — 20 mg — 20 years. Went off now back on — holding
Trazadone 37.5 mg
Buspar 5 mg two times a day

Masha4d ago

LighthousePaxil · holding

Or you pay tons of $$$ because you have to go out of network. Something has to Change!

Paxil — 20 mg — 20 years. Went off now back on — holding
Trazadone 37.5 mg
Buspar 5 mg two times a day

AJ4d ago

NavigatorCelexa · active

I know exactly what you mean about dirty windows. My progress doesn't fall neatly into the windows and waves pattern; it's much more muddied. Like I know I'm not in a wave but am far from coping well. But still trying to be grateful for not being in crisis mode.

Celexa — 3.6mg — 15+ years — actively tapering | without clinician

Masha4d ago

LighthousePaxil · holding

Exactly AJ. The crisis is over. The waves are less heavy. But my mood is all over the place. Calm then agitated then heavy. That’s what can really drive you crazy!

Paxil — 20 mg — 20 years. Went off now back on — holding
Trazadone 37.5 mg
Buspar 5 mg two times a day

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