Insights and Suggestions

I’ve been trying to work out what may be the cause of my current predicament and realised I need support and try to keep things specific to what is relevant to now. You can probably tell from my drug history that I probably live with protracted withdrawal and hypersensitivity/kindling of some kind since two plus decades of coming on and off from such drugs. Here’s where I am now: After struggling with intense feelings of flatness, followed by unwavering disparity, then followed by an intense ambivalence to live along side crying spells for many months this year, I decided I needed to reinstate my last dose of carpamazepine. This lasted all of two weeks as I couldn’t cope with the derealisation/depersonalisation which I hadn’t ever experienced before. I experienced some dulled sensations in my head during the first week of withdrawel, and overall it went fine. After reading about lamatrogine, working with a psychiatrist I started it for the first time in my life. Here’s the thing, it worked within days which surely suggests that I was probably going through a long wave/more protracted withdrawal from my previous drug history I think? Unfortunately, while titrating from 25mg to my highest dose of 100mg after a few weeks I began having debilitating headaches, neck and back pains which I understand is a common side effect, but it is also a symptom of my protracted withdrawal pattern. Out of desperation, I tried painkillers and triptans without relief. So, I decided as I was taking it for a short time (a couple of months) to stop it abruptly. Things were going well, only some dulled sensation in my head with the withdrawals and overall relief from the debilitating headaches as well as neck pain. Then unfortunately the extreme depressive symptoms came back after 3 weeks. I decided I should quickly reinstate the lamatrogine at a dose of 25mg. I instantly got the same headache and neck and back pain. So after two weeks, I decided to rapidly taper it to get to 2mg where I am today. The pain is still present but better, and sadly the depressive symptoms are back. I am unsure which way to go with this all and I am hoping members can offer insight? Gratefully, WeLiveInHope NB-Note thyroid medication has been adjusted since last year, gently tritating dose . I mention this as I can’t shake the feeling that the thyroid medication is contributing somehow. Forgive me if you’ve already come across this on other sites, as I’m figuring out which sites to use for my needs with SA website archived.