What's even real?

September 28, 2026··

I struggle a lot with the idea that I am just a "mentally ill" person that is delusional. Especially when media, medical professionals, people I know tell me that withdrawal from SSRIs does not exist. Or if it exists it couldn't be this severe or take this long. It makes me doubt myself, sometimes I even consider taking the medication again. People I know seem sceptical that I am still sick and struggling and can get even annoyed with it. Rationally I understand how this happens. But how can I be sure this is real when so many people are convinced it is not? Do any of you have similar thoughts and experiences? Thanks a lot!

Zoloft — current 2.8 mg — 6 years — actively tapering - tapered from 50 mg

8 Replies

Duloxi4d ago

Community AnchorCymbalta · holding

Hi Ani, I can really relate to your thoughts. I often wonder myself whether the symptoms I’m experiencing are withdrawal or an illness. Yes, many doctors, the media, and people we know claim this nonsense. There are certainly also people who may need to take these medications or continue taking a small dose. I think the only way to find out is to be extremely cautious when tapering, because symptoms can sometimes appear weeks later, especially after long-term use. If the process goes too quickly, it becomes extremely difficult to distinguish between withdrawal and the underlying condition. People who have never taken these medications or tried to come off them simply cannot understand what it’s like. You can’t really put yourself in that situation unless you’ve experienced it yourself. That makes it even more important that we have a community like this where we can support each other. And thankfully, there is now so much data supporting this.

Cymbalta — 15mg(12mg) — 17 Jahre — holding -with clinician - 90 mg – 2021: First tapering attempt.
60 mg – 2023: Second tapering attempt.
With a doctor's supervision—but unfortunately, a doctor who doesn't know how to properly taper off an antidepressant.

anne noni moss3d ago

WelcomerPaxil · holding

JUST MY OPINION... I have never met a person who suffers inner anguish who DOESN'T have a story of abuse. In other words, I personally don't believe in "mental illness." I know there's inner pain, but in my experience it comes from early life trauma. Neuroplasticity is my favorite word. My habits of distortion from living with abuse are being rewired! It's hard work but permanent change. The meds interfered with this but couldn't stop it. Many people believe differently but neuroplasticity gives me HOPE. "Organic mental illness " makes me feel hopeless. I have met some people who find it very reassuring to assume they have an organic mental illness they can do nothing about except medicate and manage. I mean no disrespect to them, but that thinking doesn't help me. The problem with being human is we are all so DIFFERENT and hope comes in different forms for each of us. My aim here is to reassure you that you are not "broken," @Ani. Even if your truly believe you have some organic illness, you are not broken! You deserve support, understanding and clear information with which you can make the best decisions for YOU. We will cheer you on!

atypical in presentation of side effects, super sensitive to small doses and general delayed responder. never took a psych med that didn't' make me sick immediately with infections and restless legs. have never been able to tolerate being on them, but have never had support to get off so I've been bouncing back and forth. i don't like capital letters. sorry.

Paxil — 1 mg — 2 yrs — holding until Oct. 7 doc appt.
Seroquel — 50 — planning taper |
trileptal -75 planning taper
prasozin 1 mg planning taper

DeNy2d ago

Trusted VoiceKlonopin

"neuroplasticity" — @marz

love it , almost like breathing it never stops the brain keeps rewiring the only thing I believe in this journey

Medication & Taper History:
Aug 2023 – Dec 2023: Flupentixol (0.5mg) + Melitracen (10mg)
Dec 2023: Cold Turkey (CT) off Flupentixol + Melitracen
Dec 2023 – Apr 2024: Clonazepam (up to 2mg), Amitriptyline (12.5mg) + Chlordiazepoxide (5mg)
Apr 2024 – Jun 2024: Swapped → Trifluoperazine (1mg 1–2x/day; couldn't tolerate 2x/day) + Clonazepam (2mg)
Jun 2024: CT Trifluoperazine → Maintained on Clonazepam only
Jul 2024 – Dec 2024: HOLD on Clonazepam 1.5mg (Maintained ~6 months)
Dec 2024 – Mar 2025: Water Taper (Glass jar / Wooden lid): 1.5mg → 1.24mg
Apr 2025: Took 1 dose PPI + Anticholinergic & CT Coffee (same week) → Triggered severe drug setback ( all hell broke loose ), paradoxical reaction & daily reacting at 1.24mg
Jun 2025: Hospitalized (Severe diarrhea, vomiting, IV fluids) → Forced Rapid Taper: 1.24mg to 0mg in 1 week
Jun 2025: Reinstated Clonazepam at 1.0mg
Jul 2025 – Dec 2025: HOLD at 1.0mg (Took B1 & B12 on/off daily until Dec)
Jan 2026: 0.945mg (Switched from tablet to whole milk liquid taper Glass jar / Metal cap)
Feb: 0.930mg | Mar: 0.875mg | Apr: 0.843mg | May: 0.833mg | Jun: 0.833mg | Jul: 0.831mg | Aug: 0.831mg | Sep: 0.800mg | Oct:
Current Status & Protocol:
Current Medication: Clonazepam (100ml whole milk : 1mg tablet suspension; 20ml removed)
Reductions this month:
Supplements: NONE
Diet: Low-FODMAP diet

⭐

Catina2d ago

Community AnchorEffexor

"I struggle a lot with the idea that I am just a "mentally ill" person that is delusional. Especially when media, medical professionals, people I know tell me that withdrawal from SSRIs does not exist" — @Ani

I'm sorry you feel this way Ani. I don't know much about your history, but my opinion is that too often normal human emotions are pathologized, given the name of a "disorder," and then drugged. What you are going through is very real and is often mistaken as "relapse." Do you need some suggestions on how to explain what you're going through with others? I'm not sure if you've seen this yet: https://taper.community/thread/explaining-tapering-withdrawal-to-family-friends-and-coworkers-3cd32752-122d-47df-a5ec-078a2eeb1f97

Venlafaxine (tapering) - Current dose 17.92 mg
Trazodone - 50 mg
Levothyroxine - 25 mcg

“Your brain and body know how to heal. Trust the process and keep going.”

Please Note: I am not a healthcare professional. Any advice given is based on personal experience and that of others in the lay withdrawal community.

Leminaseri2d ago

WelcomerZoloft · holding

Problem is in my family all of these psych meds are popped and stopped like candy. I know several family members, most popular one my grandma, who started and stopped Zoloft 7 times. She starts the drug, feels better, stops cold turkey, and after 2-3 years she relapses and goes back on the drug. For over 30 years. And now she is drug free. She might of course have symptoms she doesn’t show. But she isn’t pacing around, she has good appetite, she’s cognitively available despite her age. She still does home labor and she still has a smile in her face. She’s cooking delicious food. She and my grandpa they live in a small village and they eat 100% organic. Maybe that’s the trick.

Zoloft — 6,52 — 5 years and 9 months — holding | without clinician

anne noni moss2d ago

WelcomerPaxil · holding

@Leminaseri thanks for sharing this! You have great reason to hope! A legacy of recovery!!! Life can be hard and brutal and it's only human to have awful feelings when calamity hits. Like @Catina said earlier, the big mistake our society made is that doctors pathologized what otherwise used to be just the ups and downs of life. Keep posting! Keep finding those positive parts of your story. Not to minimize the hard parts. Not at all! We all deserve to grieve the grievous in our lives! But...we were designed to go THROUGH these things with support and hope in the brighter day that always comes. Yes, hard times change us, but I believe I have the choice to make the change for the better. But I need others to help me!! thanks for being here!!!!

Leminaseri2d ago

WelcomerZoloft · holding

"but neuroplasticity gives me HOPE." — @marz

Believe me, changing major things at life and beating “mental illness” is tied to so many circumstances but it is absolutely possible. Many people can’t comprehend why they feel even bad and they eat the narrative of “mental illness” and “chemical imbalance”. Thing is even if that’s scam, these people get validated by that. They get medication which they obviously don’t see as something toxic (and for some people these meds really work, and when they feel they don’t need the med anymore, they CT and they are fine. They have an excuse for their weaknesses. They just say “I’m ill”. From the very first day of my severely hard mental breakdown (like real total mental disaster) I never wanted to touch medication without even really knowing that they are toxic. But I was doing so incredibly bad that I needed them. And the second time around when i got put on Zoloft, even though I have my problems with the drug.. it helped me! And now that I’m in withdrawal, I see the times in my mind where I was on bigger doses of this drug. And man I was actually doing pretty solid. Yeah I was an obese. I was prediabetic. I got fatigued pretty quickly. But it was still 500x than the hell I am in now.

Zoloft — 6,52 — 5 years and 9 months — holding | without clinician

anne noni moss2d ago

WelcomerPaxil · holding

@Leminaseri . thanks for your honesty and for providing more detail. Absolutely, absolutely. ABSOLUTAMENTE...do what is best for YOU! There's no shame in feeling you need something. We are all here doing the best we can, trying to find our way in a situation that is so difficult and, sadly, controversial. I hope you feel supported where you are. I'm just another sufferer trying to walk straight. I know you will find the help you need as you continue to be honest and true to yourself!

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